I call you a dream because that is exactly what you are to me. A ghost in my sub-conscious that haunts my everyday life. I look for you daily, but to no avail. I know you exist, somewhere, but I struggle to find you. It’s not for a lack of trying, either. There were many that I thought were you, but I was proved wrong night after night when I’d dream of you instead of them. So, instead of waiting for you to come me, I’ve decided that I’ll throw myself out at the universe, hoping to land in your thoughts. This letter is for you.
I must firstly apologize, for in my mind I feel as if I’ve been dishonest with you. I feel as if I’ve betrayed your trust by looking for you in the eyes and beds of others’. I’m truly sorry. I understand now how futile my attempts at finding you were. You might be asking yourself if I haven’t left a trail of destruction behind me in my attempts at looking for you. I have. I’ve left many a broken heart, mine included, in my wake and I fear that the trail might not end here. Time and effort that has been spent on nurturing those supposed relationships, wasted. But at the same time, not. I feel that without those worthless months of my life spent thinking that I’d found you, I won’t be the person that you need when we finally meet. When we finally kiss. When I finally know that my next letter will have your name on it. But no one knows when that will be, so I continue searching, not as intently, but I search none the less. I can only hope that I don’t have much longer to search for you, but even if I do, I shall continue. I shan’t give up. I will find you.
I hope that you are well and are as eager to meet me as I am you.